Nematocyst
1st September 2005, 20:33
If this year wasn't as good as last year, whine about piracy until the stockholders believe that's the reason.
If this year was better than last year, pretend it wasn't and whine about piracy. Internally, whine about piracy until everyone believes the year would have been better still without it.
If a junior exec suggests that measures to combat piracy lead to reduced profits, fire him and whine some more about piracy.
If anyone suggests that reduced profits stem from any reason but piracy, fire him and whine about piracy.
Form a group to think about what movies we can remake this year. But don't forget to whine some more about piracy.
See if we can shut down some websites if we whine loud enough about piracy.
Suggest the need for a new action flick with no plot, but lots of chase scenes and people doing naughty things. Include lots of one liners because people are too stupid to get anything subtle. Then whine about piracy while promoting the film as "This Year's Best Film" and getting all the critics on our payroll to give it two thumbs up.
When reduced sales start really hurting, whine about piracy while lobbying for more draconian laws in the name of stopping it.
When staying afloat becomes impossible, whine about piracy until the government bails us out, which they'll do because the reason for collapse had to be piracy and inadequate laws for dealing with it.
If this year was better than last year, pretend it wasn't and whine about piracy. Internally, whine about piracy until everyone believes the year would have been better still without it.
If a junior exec suggests that measures to combat piracy lead to reduced profits, fire him and whine some more about piracy.
If anyone suggests that reduced profits stem from any reason but piracy, fire him and whine about piracy.
Form a group to think about what movies we can remake this year. But don't forget to whine some more about piracy.
See if we can shut down some websites if we whine loud enough about piracy.
Suggest the need for a new action flick with no plot, but lots of chase scenes and people doing naughty things. Include lots of one liners because people are too stupid to get anything subtle. Then whine about piracy while promoting the film as "This Year's Best Film" and getting all the critics on our payroll to give it two thumbs up.
When reduced sales start really hurting, whine about piracy while lobbying for more draconian laws in the name of stopping it.
When staying afloat becomes impossible, whine about piracy until the government bails us out, which they'll do because the reason for collapse had to be piracy and inadequate laws for dealing with it.